13 Feb Speaking up & self care
Speaking up is one of the most terrifying thoughts for me. I know I’m not alone when I say that. It could be small things, it can be major moments and I find myself struggling to find my voice. Here’s what goes through my head when I’m faced with speaking up or staying tight lipped:
- If I say something I’ll hurt someones feelings and they could possibly die (not just figuratively but literally)
- Somehow the world will end
- Others will think I’m crazy, mean, selfish, weird, weak, possibly heartless and whatever else is terrible
- Someone could look me square in the eyes and cry!
- The earths gravitational pull will be disrupted and cause the end of mankind as we know it
In no particular order the above swims through my head and I find myself paralyzed. I’ve taken personality tests and they’ve told me I’m a highly sensitive person, an empath, quiet leader, humanitarian, etc, but how am I supposed to be this amazing person if I can’t speak up?
As I’m writing this I realized that this topic was one of my very first blogs a few years ago! Funny, it still weighs heavily on me at times. I think that like most things in life, mastering this won’t be a constant. Like most skills you have to work at it and use it. For me I’m realizing when I take care of myself (I mean really practice self-care) I do pretty good when it comes to opening my mouth and speaking up. I’ve also recognized that speaking up can be walking away. Actions speak louder than words at times.
Having a daily routine where I feel strong and calm helps me immensely. Think about it, when you listen to your bodies needs, get proper rest, eat right, exercise, relax and all that good stuff…you’re less willing to let an unjust or uncomfortable situation continue. You’ll be present and ready to share your feelings.
I’ve encountered rude people, friends leaving without a word, family upsets and random stresses. Looking back on it all so far, I handle it with such clarity when I’m clear with myself! These are my thoughts when I’m in a better and honest place with myself:
- People are angry because they’re hurting and that’s their deal
- Friends move on and forget to tell you sometimes and that’s ok, it’s also their deal
- Family will always be family and that’s that (LOL)
- Life doesn’t stop for a bad day so just keep going
So, take a long hot bath, read that book you’ve been wanting to read, get your nails done, go for a walk, do the thing that makes you feel good. Add activities and rest into your schedule. Your mind will appreciate it and you’ll feel better. Therefore, when the time comes to speak or be spoken to: You’ll choose wisely.
I’d love to hear what helps you feel confident enough to speak up. Share below or shoot me an email;)